Author: Eve Posen

Heal the World

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It seems to me that there is a lot of healing to be done in the world. My world is broken. The world i see with my eyes, hear, live in is hurting, and needs to be fixed. As I embarked 2 days ago on my journey this summer, the world became a different place to me. As I embarked 10 months ago for my year in Israel, the world changed in my eyes. What can I do to fix it? 2 days ago my work began, significant work. Work that is moving in the right direction. I dont’ want to perfect the world, because well, i don’t think anything is perfect, and if it were perfect, it wouldn’t be real.
Now, I know that all of these problems and hurts existed before, and I wanted to help then as well. I am not naive, and I know that there is a lot to be done. What I am talking about is my new perspective.
I’m just thinking about our world, and the injustice that is so prevalent in daily life. The women who can’t feed their children, the children who are punished because of a society that instead of working for the children works against the adults.
I guess I’m just doing a lot of thinking these days. Today I went to my placement for the first time. I am working for a very special project, advocating for social change. Advocating for those whose voice is rarely listened to. And my voice will be heard. Whether it is because I was one of those considered “Lucky” in our society to have been born as I am, look the way I look, or because I can empathize, sympathize and agonize with the community I am working with. Our voices will be heard.
I guess you could say I am hooked. After these past 3 days, I have been shown an entirely new world, one that is bleeding and broken, but one that I have the tools to fix. This is really incoherent, probably because I haven’t quite been able to process everything yet, but this is the beginning.
“You are not obligated to complete the task, neither are you free to desist from it…” HERE I GO!

Riding along in my….

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train car. That’s right, I am finally living in a city with public transportation that is usable, semi-affordable, and doesn’t involve me sitting in my own car for hours. I get to take the “L” to work every morning and home every night. This is a new and big thing for me. First of all, I have a terrible sense of direction, so it’s not easy for me to figure out which one to get on, where to go, what direction it should be going. Even if i read the signs and have a map. But, Chicago seems to be pretty easy to figure out. And, with the help of one of my roommates for the summer, I was able to figure out the best way to get to and from the office and from my placement.
Today was the first day I took the “L” by myself, as it was our first day of placement. Armed with my map and directions memorized, I headed out on my own. I needed to take 2 trains, one of which I have taken before to get to work, and one I had never seen before. It went off without a hitch. My train was pretty empty, on time, and when the transfer came, I found a nice person, asked if I was standing and waiting for the right train, and that was that. I made it to work in 1 hr. without a headache or sitting in traffic for hours.
I think I”ll like taking the “L”. Yesterday, i found myself making up stories for the people who came on to the train. Today, i enjoyed my ipod and my book, and taking in the scenery on my way south and then back north through the city. There was something relaxing and peaceful about the train, something that kept me in my head, thinking, but relaxing. I have a built in hour before and hour after work to relax, decompress, reflect. There isn’t anything else I can do, so I will make the best use of the time as I can. I LIKE THE “L”, yay for public transit!

Here We Go Again

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So, there is a common thread in my life that is becoming more and more noticeable. My Bat Mitzvah portion seems to creep up on me in the strangest ways, and at the most interesting times. It was of course my grandfather’s parsha, the parsha my first week of Rabbinical School, the parsha when I moved to Israel for the year, it was studied at various events, and now, once more, on the second day of my summer job we studied its words again.
It begins with “When you will go out to war.” I have seen this fitting in many ways, since It always seems to be the parsha when I am on my way out into a new leg of my journey, so it is fitting here. It was also fitting that it was a war, because when I went to Israel it was to a “war” and now again I am embarking on a war for social justice. It continues on with many, many different commandments, one of which discusses our obligation to pay attention and see the world around us. We are not to ignore issues that need our attention. So fitting for what I am doing this summer.
But I also have to wonder if there is a reason this text, this specific section of all the texts I study keeps popping up in my world. It just seems too coincidental to me. it makes me journey seem more meaningful and almost appears as a sign telling me I am on the right path. Even, when I already know i am on the right path. So today, I set out again on yet another journey. My summer internship began with an “action” or “protest” yesterday and tomorrow I will visit my internship sight for the first time. This summer, i will engage in the war, I will go out into the world. This summer, my eyes will be opened, and I will not ignore

Like a Rolling Stone

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So, I’ve been home a little over a week and I am still readjusting. In the last 10 days I have lived in Israel, Michigan and now Chicago. I have touched ground in Israel, Atlanta, Michigan, Indiana and Illinois, and I have lived in 3 different time zones. Surprisingly, I haven’t had hardly any jet lag. My readjustment is still progressing slowly. In some ways, it feels like I never left, and in others it seems like I have been away for far too long.
It was quite wonderful to see my family again after so many months apart. Having my dog jump on me and go crazy was an incredible feeling only to have been beat by the feeling of hugging my mom, dad, sister, aunts, uncles and grandfather again. I left 9 months ago, and I returned, everyone is still in one piece, and I am very thankful for that.
As ready as I was to come home, I miss Israel terribly. I miss the atmosphere, hearing Hebrew everywhere I go, I miss the people, my friends, my apartment. Although, it is quite nice to have carpeting and cable and a car. I’m sort of in this in between state of not knowing where I am and trying to figure out where I am landing myself. It will be very nice once I settle in here in Chicago for the summer to be in one place again for a few months.
So, how did my reentry go? Well, I got home to find 2 of my bags did not make it quite to Detroit with me, but were soon delivered to my house. I immediately had a delicious new york bagel, unpacked, relaxed with carpeting, air conditioning and lots and lots of channels on TV. I have now eaten all of my favorite foods, had a fantastic lunch with my sister, fun family dinners, reconnected with a few old friends, and made some new ones. I went to a Tigers game with my mom and sister, and had a fantastic time relaxing before the big move over to Chicago.
After 7 full days at home, I packed up again, and drove myself down to Chicago. I was very very sad to be leaving my family and friends so soon, but I am only about 5 hours away in the car. Anything is better than 14 or more hours by plane! The best part of Chicago is that I am living only a few short blocks away from my uncle. It is wonderful to be living in a city with family, especially with family i don’t get to see all the time.
I arrived Friday afternoon. After I got myself into the apartment I quickly changed and headed out to Shabbat services and dinner with my Uncle at his synagogue. It was wonderful to meet his friends, and join a wonderful community. We davened, sang and ate the homemade goodies my uncle made for the Oneg. I very much enjoyed being in his company and getting to know a bit of Chicago I hadn’t seen before. Shabbat was very relaxing and involved getting to know one of my roommates. I am living in an apartment with 3 other people. We are subletting for the summer. We are now finally all moved in and slowly getting to know each other before we begin our work tomorrow. It all promises to be a fantastic summer! Today I went grocery shopping and found a few Kosher places to buy my favorite salami and other foods. and now I am jsut relaxing before joining the work force again!
A pretty simple and straightforward update. I should mention that I came home just in time to say goodbye to my Rabbi who will be leaving in a few weeks to take his post as the Dean of JTS rabbinical school. It was wonderful to return to the place that has such a profound influence on me and my decision to become a rabbi. Walking in the door, seeing my friends, my community brought me back to reality, made it feel like home.
So, here I go. Off on another journey, finding my way, a new adventure! And it promises to be fun! Off to take on the Windy City!!

I’m Going Home

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Below is my journal entry after I boarded the plane:
Here I sit, on the plane, a few minutes from take off and this song plays. I start to cry. I am actually leaving my home of the last 10 months. It is over.
I did so much, but there was so much more to do, and I am going home. But, I am leaving home, and here are the tears, flowing, streaming freely down my face. They are sad tears, but they are happy tears. Perhaps they are tears of pride and joy. I am leaving my new family, my friends. I know I will see them again, and soon- but for now, we say goodbye. We hung on to each other for life at times, other times we caught one another, supported each other. We clung to the last minutes of being together. Watching the season finale of “Grey’s Anatomy” in the airport with a classmate until I had to board my flight. Tears, streaming down my face, confusion, fear. I am going home, I am facing the pain and sorrow that stood in the back of my mind all year. In Israel, I was free, I was me, I didn’t have to deal with life at home if I didn’t want to. But here I am, on a plane, mere hours from returning to the life I left. Returning a different person. Returning unsure of how to deal with some of the changes that face me upon my return. Returning to leave again in 6 days.
They are tears of the unknown, what will it be like to return to America after 9 months and 6 days? How will it feel? Will I know what to do without Hebrew? Without everything I have become so used to? How will it be to be with my family?
The pilot just came on- one last Israel Experience- in the middle of our preparation for take off, the air traffic control workers went on strike! I have to smile thru the tears, how fitting!
I did it, I made it alone in Israel. I am so proud of myself. I am independent, I took care of myself, without my usual supports, without the support I thought I couldn’t live without. I am o.k. Now, I can do anything.
Here we go, cleared for take off. 9 months ago I arrived, now I leave, a new person, a better person, a more confident, independent me. No looking back, no turning back, here we go. I have an entire row to myself, this is it. And how fitting, they are showing “Pirates” which i watched so many times this year with my classmates.