Shabbat Shalom?

A few random thoughts on Shabbat! Does the fact that I am a woman mean that I am not worthy of being wished Shabbat Shalom? As I was walking to Shul this week, i was bothered as usual when every man I passed proceeded to turn their head away from me when passing by. On Shabbat morning, more often than not, the people who I pass by on my way to services will wish me a Shabbat Shalom, and acknowledge my existence. But Friday nights, I am not afforded that luxury. This week was particularly bothersome. I was about half way to shul when a guy in full on frum garb walked out of his building towards me. I saw him, and my immediate reaction was to say Shabbat shalom as I do to most people I pass by on the street (perhaps I am too nice!). He saw me in the distance and as he passed me, he turned his head and started to mutter to himself so as not to have even the slightest interaction with me.
Now, I value religious convictions and different levels of observance, but I found this to be rude and degrading. Don’t i deserve to have a Shabbat Shalom? is being a woman such a crime that I can’t even be wished a simple greeting? 2 of the 3 mitzvoth I am commanded to do according to orthodox practice are related to Shabbat, yet this man couldn’t wish me a Shabbat Shalom? I dont know. I am disappointed not because this man doesnt’ acknowledge my validity to be a rabbi, that i can’t argue with him about because we will never see eye to eye. I am upset because the mere fact that I am a woman invalidates me in his eyes from deserving a Shabbat Shalom! Another Israel Experience!!

PURIM SAMEACH?

This past week in School we were learning in Hebrew class about Purim and the mixed feelings of some with the celebration of the holiday and that got me to thinking about the holiday. It was strange to be celebrating Purim in Israel. First, because i live in Jerusalem, i was to celebrate Shushan Purim, a day after the rest of the world celebrated Purim. This created some fun questions as the night that Purim was to begin for the rest of the world, i was outside Jerusalem, and wondered what to do about the Ma’ariv Amidah and the additions for Purim. what a strange experience, that I could only have in Israel, living in Jerusalem!

As I began writing this entry yesterday, there were many cars outside my window blasting their Purim cheer for everyone to hear. And while it was quite annoying when I wanted to take my Purim nap, i enjoyed the festivities all around. I spent my Purim with friends, having a good, SOBER time. That’s right. This year, i decided not to drink on Purim as many do, but to follow the advice of my dear teacher Rabbi Dorff and instead of being drunk to not tell the difference between Haman and Mordecai, I took a nap. this Purim was about being me and growing. Last Purim I drank too much and I missed out on the celebration and the meaning of the holiday. This year, I focused on the holiday. Purim is another holiday that celebrates the triumph of the Jews over an enemy, but at the same time, others died in our triumph. And, we must not forget the terrible massacre done by Baruch Goldstein on Purim as an act of revenge. Purim is not a holiday to act our of revenge, but rather to remember the gift of life and survival we have. And while enemies still try and attack us, the Jewish people push on, live through it, stay strong.

Purim was a fun 2 days off. I of course stuck with the theme of creating costumes based on my name. thanks Mom and Dad for giving me such a versatile name! This year’s winner was EVEning. What could be better than spending the day in my pj’s having fun with friends and eating Oznei Haman. As the day came to an end I ventured down to Rechov Hillel for the city wide Purim celebration with live music and all the works. What a great end. Fun and games, music, laughter and smiles, a day without worry, a day of fun, a day of celebration of our freedoms, a day to be me, and show the pieces I hide on occasion during the rest of the year!

ALPHABET SOUP and Pluralism

This past Shabbat I spent my time on the Ta Shma Shabbaton for Rav Siach, my inter-denominational learning group. This was the culmination of a week of pluralism and alphabet soup. The week began with an afternoon and evening with the UJC and students from HUC (reform), RRC (Reconstructionist), JTS (Conservative) and YU (yeshiva university, Orthodox) gathering together to learn what the UJC does. Might you have noticed that there are a few schools missing? Of the invited schools, the person who was doing hte welcome left out the Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies at the UJ (my school!) not to mention Hebrew College and the Aleph Students who are also studying in Israel for the year but were not invited to the event. The event, which had the potential to be a powerful networking experience across denominations turned into a big balagan. The event was mainly to promote the UJC and to tell us how important it is for us to support them when we are ordained as Rabbis. I am used to this sort of deal, so that didn’t bother me. What bothered me was the lack of acceptance and pluralism along the way. The evening culminated at YU’s campus in Jerusalem. As the students began to arrive for dinner, a group of Conservative and Reform rabbinical students wanted to Daven Ma’ariv. When they asked if there was a space on campus to daven in an egalitarian fashion, they were told that they were not allowed to have an Egalitarian Minyan in the building. So the group of us ended up outside in the dark, davening Ma’ariv. Only adding to the already uncomfortable experience was the use of the term “Spiritual Leader” in place of Rabbi when being addressed by a YU leader. I understand that the movements are different, that is why we have different schools, learning institutions, synagogues, etc. but, if we are being brought together to promote tolerance and pluralism, shouldn’t we all be acknowledging the legitimacy of the other. I left this evening feeling disappointed about the attempt at pluralism.

Adding to this feeling was the knowledge that the coming Friday I was to board a bus with my colleagues from 8 other seminaries for a shabbat of pluralism. I could only hope that the outcome of that weekend would be better than the attempt of UJC to bring us together. The weekend started out with an incredible hike in the North. Getting up early on my one day off during the week was not something I was looking forward to, but it was worth it. We headed out of Jerusalem and headed North via the West Bank. This was my first trip through the contested area, and I was taken aback by the beauty of the flowers. A sea of yellow, purple, pink, and the green that was beginning to flood the area. There I was left alone with my thoughts on the bus as we climbed north. Alone in my head thinking about the complexities of the country as they tied into the complexities of the Shabbat I was about to experience. And then we passed a lone Israeli flag on the side of the road. And I was reminded of how much I am connected to this land, how much I grow every time i venture outside the walls of my apartment. we reached our first rest stop, right outside the west bank, and it was a mini-UN meeting. People of all faiths and nationalities waited for the facilities, mixed together, and somehow I knew this weekend would be o.k.

After a rather long hike in a slippery hill, and some learning about Truth and peace, we boarded the bus again for the 45 minute drive to our residence for Shabbat. After all the planning, trying to figure out how far each of us was willing to bend and where the line was drawn, we created our own pluralistic Shabbat. I found myself comfortable the entire time, with boundaries set that I was o.k. with, and I was pushed to find a place for myself. While we had a trichitza, three sections, it didn’t really matter where I sat because I was always a part of the service. the men went and supported the lone Orthodox member of our group, and he came over to our mixed side of the mechitzah for kabbalat shabbat. we joined together for singing overlooking the beauty of the kinneret before Shabbat, joined in with one another striving to push the boundaries and make everyone feel comfortable.

What i found to be the most impressive was the warmth and eagerness to learn from one another that was exhibited by my colleagues. And, while I know this was just one instance of Pluralism working, of everyone coming together, it brought me hope for the future that compromise is possible, that conversation will work, that one day we will all accept one another for who we are, for what we believe in and for the common good.

The weekend was made complete by the end of Shabbat. I spent my afternoon looking out on the kinneret, lost in my thoughts, centering myself, trying to get back to that place of love and inner peace I had this summer. This year I have been on a roller coaster of emotions, not sure where I would land. I have been up and down, and I miss the Eve who smiled like there was no tomorrow, who laughed and loved every chance I had. I miss the Eve from this summer, I so badly needed to center. So I sat there, listened tot he rush of the waters, the sound of children laughing and I centered. I centered on peace and happiness, two things I am striving for, for myself and for my world. And I stared across the Kinneret at Jordan, that country on the other side. The country I look at as I drive Israel’s inner boarder. The country I was in less than a month ago taking in the beauty of Petra. The country of the unknown I take in across the Kinneret, across the dead sea, across the Red Sea. the country I stare at so often. And i see the difference between Israel and Jordan, more pronounced than ever as we drive through the populated and built up sides of Israel and see the vast emptiness of Jordan. As I sat at the Kinneret, i found myself being happy for who I am, and wondering about Israel. There were 2 boys there with their dad, learning how to skip stones. they couldn’t have been more than 10 years old. And as my mind drifted I surprised myself with the thought that in just 8 years, these smiling boys, carefree boys would be enlisting in the Army as their father had. There was something scary and comforting by that thought. What a complex society this is, yet we must not forget to smile, laugh and enjoy the time we have together.

Shabbat ended with a beautiful Havdallah service. We sat there, listening to the brachot, our faces only lit by the glow of the twisted candle. I felt a sense of calmness and hope in the future. It was the end of a mixed week, and the beginning of a new week. Klal Yisrael is alive and well in my own, isolated community, perhaps one day alphabet soup will be not just another list of organizations working on separate causes, but a list of a united Jewish community. Ani Ma’amin!

SIX MONTHS and Counting

So, I did it, I have lived in Israel for 6 months. what an accomplishment for me. I arrived not knowing what would come of the year, and while I still don’t know for sure, I know I have grown, stretched, learned in ways I didn’t know I could. And, I have to say I have learned so much about Israeli society. The pieces I LOVE, the pieces I could do without, and the pieces I can’t quite decide what to do with. What a wonderfully complex society to engage in for a year of growth. I have had good days and bad days, mostly, I have felt the pains of growing and changing in a foreign place. I crave 5 minutes with my family, with those who I hold so dear in my heart but haven’t seen for 6 months. While I am eagerly looking forward to my reentry into America, I know that there will be a whole in my heart that will only be filled by living in Israel.

As a cool piece of fun information. The Shabbat of my arrival to Israel this year was the Shabbat of my bat mitzvah portion. How special it was for me to read my Haftorah in Israel on the anniversary of an event that led to my decision to become a rabbi. Furthermore, the Shabbat that marked the completion of my 6th month in Israel was Shabbat Zachor, the maftir of this Shabbat; my bat mitzvah parsha. And again, I was able to celebrate me, my Jewish connection, my Jewish Journey! And the Journey moves on…

Little Bo EVE has Lost Her Sheep!

Last Week, after returning from the fantastic trip to Eilat and Petra, I spent 2 days enjoying the sun in Jerusalem and running errands and then I joined the Conservative Yeshiva and my friends for another day long Tiyul. This tiyul was not like any other Tiyul I have gone on lately. This Tiyul was to a place called Neot Kedumim. This site about 10 minutes fromt he airport in Tel Aviv is a biblical gardens, complete with many biblical plants, ancient ruins and my favorite part, the wonderful hands on learning experience of…. HERDING SHEEP AND GOATS!!! That’s right, I herded some sheep and goats with my group.
The experience was incredible because it is the first time that I have been able to actively take part in something so hands on and so natural instead of just looking at the ruins and hiking for hours on end. A must do for anyone coming to Israel!! ANd now, i can check shepherding off my to do list!!