Here is a copy of the D’var Torah i gave for Second Day Rosh HaShannah at my home shul! The actual presentation may have varied from the written text! ENJOY!

Indulge me if you will. Close your eyes. Picture yourself about to face the biggest challenge or test of your life. Are you scared? Nervous? Excited? Are you going to ROCK IT? Are you willing to do ANYTHING to pass? Hold those feelings.

Open your eyes. Here we are, standing on the starting line of a whole new test, a new year, a new challenge. Here we stand as the book of life is open wide, blank spaces waiting to be filled with our deeds. ARE YOU READY? Are you HERE?

Our torah reading for today, known as Akeidat Yitzhak, the binding of Isaac, details Abraham’s big test, his GRE, ACT, SAT, MCAT, take your pick. The portion begins with God putting Abraham to the test. He is told to take his son, his only son, his favored son, Isaac to a mountain and offer him up as a sacrifice. WHOA. This is quite the test. A voice comes from seemingly nowhere and informs Abraham that he is to sacrifice his own son, the one whom he has waited so long for, the one who was given to him as a gift (as we read yesterday).

I don’t know about you, but if this was me, I am not so sure I would be so eager to complete this test. But, Abraham, being the man of faith that he is answers God with a strong “HINEINI, Here I am.” Abraham is up to the task. He sets out with Isaac on the journey to Mount Moriah, and as they approach Isaac and Abraham take leave of their servants and begin father son bonding time as they hike up the mountain.

Now Isaac, being the inquisitive pre-teen that he was, starts to ask some obvious questions. Where is the animal for slaughter? Abraham answers in his own, faithful way, “God will see to the sheep for his burnt offering.” And Isaac accepts this as they continue on their way.

Abraham then prepares Isaac for the sacrifice, and just as he is about to commit the final act, taking the final test, an Angel, or messenger of God stops his hand. God calls out to Abraham and again he answers with “HINENI, HERE I AM!” What a close call. Abraham was about to make the ultimate sacrifice in his life for his faith, his belief in God. Abraham “Passes” God’s test and as a reward, is promised that He will be the father of a great nation, as numerous as the stars of heaven and the sands on the seashore.

The portion concludes with a genealogy of Abraham’s family. At first glance, the parshah appeared disjointed to me, first we read about this incredibly intense test of faith, and then, out of the blue we are thrown a genealogy. While I am still not exactly sure how this flows, I think the text hints at the importance of family. While Abraham was willing to sacrifice his own son, and while their father-son bond might never be the same, they are still family, they still have connections to one another.

So, why did the rabbis decide to read this portion on the second day of our new year?

Perhaps they chose this text to remind us of the challenges in our daily lives, to remind us that while life might be challenging, whereas we might be asked to do tasks we don’t want, don’t feel up to doing, there might be some greater purpose to these actions. maybe this is to remind us of our roots, our genealogy, our support system?

Perhaps this is our wake up call, our time to announce “HINEINI, HERE I AM” I am ready for the task, ready to face the year, ready to commit. These texts in our parshah today are challenging, they challenge the human nature, they challenge the boundaries of comfort, what are we willing to sacrifice?

This year, may we find the strength within ourselves to call out HINEINI, HERE I AM in the face of a challenge. May we find the strength to support those around us who are facing a challenge and may we be blessed with the gift of success as we fill the blank pages of the book of life.

G’mar Chatimah Tovah, may we all be sealed in the book of life!

Shanah Tova!

Shannah Tovah!

“That’s me in the corner/ That’s me in the spotlight /Losing my religion /Trying to keep up with you /And I don’t know if I can do it /Oh no I’ve said too much/ I haven’t said enough / I thought that I heard you laughing”

While the words are from the band REM, the message is all too familiar in our lives, and in our torah portion.

Losing my religion… Life, death, the tumultuous cycle of the year. We have completed another year and are beginning another one. Here we stand, a year later, about to read the same torah portion we’ve read so many times before. So what? One of the pieces of Judaism that I find most compelling is the emphasis on repetition. Some of you might be bored, reading the same words, the same torah portion year after year, time after time. I, however, love the quest of looking for something new each time I read the text.

Our torah portion this morning is from Bereshit, Genesis, the beginning of the Torah, we’ll read it now, and we’ll read it again in a few weeks as it comes up in our yearly cycle. So, you might be asking yourself, what makes it so special? Why was this picked for the Head of the year?

In rereading the parshah in preparation for today, I have found Some interesting life lessons from the words we will read in just a few moments.

The reading begins with some very powerful words, “V’adonai Pakad et Sara.” And the Lord visited, or in our translation, took note of Sarah. The lord took note of Sarah when she was in trouble. The Lord remembered the words he had promised to Sarah and Abraham in their desire for a child.

The portion goes on to speak about the birth of Isaac, the child of Abraham and Sarah, Abraham does as God asks, and circumcises his son. Then we learn of Isaac’s namesake, the laughter that ensued when Sarah learned she and Abraham would be given the gift of a child in their old age. The torah tells us upfront that, Abraham and Sarah, doubted God, in fact, they laughed in God’s face, and yet, they were still given this gift. They doubted their faith, and still, God took note.

As the tale continues, the saga of Abraham, Sarah, Hagar, Isaac and Ishmael unfolds and the intersection of their lives reveals aspects of human nature that aren’t necessarily appealing. The first, and perhaps, according to some, most important lesson: ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOUR WIFE. Sarah tells Abraham to banish Hagar and Ishmael from their home. Abraham is a bit hesitant, however, God reassures Abraham that the right thing to do is to listen to his wife’s voice.

IN this interaction between Abraham and Sarah, Sarah appears jealous, unsure of herself, wanting the best for her son. One might even argue, that the jealousy Sarah expresses is out of her deep, passionate love for her family, and her fighting will to do anything she can to keep it together.

On the flipside, Hagar and Ishmael are banished from the house, end up alone in the desert, without food, water or shelter. Hagar fears for the worst, perhaps she is “losing her religion.” But, the boy weeps and God takes note once more. Again, God comes through, not neglecting even those who doubt God’s presence.

As the portion for today concludes, Abraham makes an oath with Avimelech, who points out to Abraham that God is with him in all that he does. A powerful message evidenced by the encounters with God of Sarah, Hagar, and Abraham.

Our parshah emphasizes God’s presence in the world, in the best of times and the worst of times. Our lives are similar to those of Abraham, Sarah and Hagar, we all have moments of disbelief; our job is to believe, to laugh, and to live.

As we engage in this gift of a new year, may we be blessed to laugh, to trust in God, to experience feelings of jealousy, but only because they represent a strong passion to protect those close to us, those we love, may we recognize the ways God is with us, even when we feel like we are “losing our religion”,——when we can’t feel God’s presence. May we be blessed in the ways of Abraham and Sarah, in their ability to Laugh, even in the hardest of times, and with the gift of God’s everlasting presence.

As a little girl, my daddy was always my hero. He knew the answers to any question I asked him, or so I thought. I am the quintessential daddy’s girl. He was my best friend, he understood me, he supported me, even when he didn’t necessarily agree with my decisions. My dad was my number one fan, tied neck and neck with my papa. Daddy always knew the right thing to say, even if I didn’t want to hear it at that moment.

So much of who I am, and who I will be is tied to my father. In the last few weeks it has been pointed out to me by various individuals how much like my father I am. Sometimes it is in my need to always have a beverage with me in case I become thirsty, or always having a pen, or making a list. But, more than that, my father and I shared a bond of Jewish learning, of passing that passion down l’dor v’dor, from generation to generation. My dad has brought learning and Judaism to mlife for so many people. And, as my father wrote in one of his last emails to me,

“I pray to have the strength and wherewithal to be able to lead a
seder again with you or as may be the case without and perhaps if God wills
it then for a new generation. (This is not meant to be pressure in any way.
But for me the most important reason I poured my all into the s’darim were
the children.)” Hemade games and fun for the seder for me, my sister, my cousins, and my family. We will never forget the posen Passover puzzle and challenge, reading our favorite reading, I am a Jew, Edmond Fleg and the shtick he added when it came time to sing.

As my father told me, time after time about his father, “Never told me how to live, lived his life and allowed me to watch.” My father also did the same with my sister and I. He allowed his love of Judaism, family and life to shine through in his darkest moments and took pride in being able to pass that on. He always was sharing with me different interpretations of texts, as he read my blog and reinterpreted the texts I was sharing with him.

In the last few weeks as we have been cleaning out my papa’s apartment, my aunt found a letter my father had written to my papa during his junior year in Israel. He wrote about his struggle with finding the balance between living with his family and living an observant life. The pain he felt when he thought about not driving to shul which would mean not spending the holidays with his family. He was pained by these decisions he might have to make had he applied to the Jewish Theological Seminary for Rabbinical school. He wrote about his fears during the admissions processes, his love for Israel. While I knew my father had contemplated rabbinical school, I didn’t know how similar our struggles were in making the decision. When it came down to it, my father didn’t want to separate himself from his family, and at that time was unable to find a way to make that work. At the same time, I learned that my daddy also made the decision not to apply to rabbinical school because while a rabbi can help the Jewish people, being a social worker could he could help everyone, including the Jewish people.

This letter showed my father’s want to earn the title of rabbi from a school, but instead, he earned the title of rabbi from me and from so many others that he taught. My daddy will always be my rabbi, my teacher, my friend. As I have read and reread the emails from my daddy, and played our most recent phone calls over again in my head, there is no doubt in my mind that my daddy was my rabbi, he taught me how to tackle a challenge, how to push myself when I thought I couldn’t go on, how to be confident in my decisions, even if I was terrified of the changes that would ensue.

Mostly, and most evident in my conversations with him, my daddy helped me to set my roots firm, and pushed me to spread my wings. Roots and wings. My roots being who I am, and my wings helping me to soar to new heights. This is what he was most proud of in me.

I see myself in him, in his struggles, journeys, thoughts. I am lost without him. Who will solve my problems with me? There are so many things I don’t know how to do on my own, so many things we were going to do together, learn together. There is a hole in my life that will never be filled. The love of my father for my mother has taught me so much about relationships, and watching them grow together. I am so blessed ot have shared 25 years with my daddy, to have his blessings, to have his support.

Over the last few years, as my dad’s illnesses became more intense, his emails to me were more about reflection on his life and gifts he wanted to offer me. The best part of my week was often receiving and email from my daddy that I would immediately print and tape to my wall around my bedroom to help me smile and make it through a challenge.

As my dad wrote to me after I began my first year of rabbinical school:

© You have to know that my love is unending whether I am physically present or in God’s hands

© You don’t have to be scared for me – this is our expression of faith

© You don’t have to be scared for you – the material is easier or harder but you will find ways to reach your goals

© Let us all learn to spend our time and our conversations expressing our love, respect, admiration and remember that we are indeed

ohvukt okmc

© I will always be in your “inbox” and if the words are the same or similar it is because we always try to reduce all we know and feel into these funny bullets (hearts).

L The down side – it isn’t just a 45 minute ride to give you a hug.

These bullet points are my dad’s legacy to me, his hopes and wishes for all of us.

In the last year, he began a tradition of blessing me each Shabbat via email or the phone, and on the rare occasions I was actually physically present. I learned somewhere that just as children are a blessing to parents (most of the time), parents are a blessing to children. And so, I would bless him with the same words he blessed me, because my parents are truly blessed to have found one another.

And now, when I have to say goodbye to daddy’s physical presence in my daily life, I bless him as he blesses me.

Yevarechecha Adonai V’yishmerecha

May God bless you and guard over you

Yaer Adonai Panav Eilecha Viychunecha

May God shine the divine presence on you and show you favor

Yisa Adonia panav eilecha v’yasem l’cha Shalom!

May God treat you kindly and set you at Peace!

As my daddy said: In any event, know that you always have my blessings and my love. They weigh nothing so the Airline cannot take it away or charge you extra. It folds up neatly into your heart and all you have to do is open your heart and the blessings will pack themselves.

I will carry you in my heart always daddy, and I know you will be watching and supporting me always.

I LOVE YOU!