What Christmas Looks Like – Parshat Vayechi 5776

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What Christmas Looks Like

As a rabbi, I’m always studying religious customs and traditions – it comes with the job. And this time of year, it’s hard not to notice Christmas. It probably comes as no surprise that Santa Claus, Christmas trees, and bargains like “Happy Honda Days” weren’t part of the Christmas celebrations of two thousand years ago. What is fascinating is that the Christmas holiday of the 1800s to the present bears no resemblance to what church officials established around the fourth century C.E.

For the first few hundred years after the death of Jesus, only Easter was celebrated; there was no such thing as Christmas. Once it was determined that Jesus’s birth would also be commemorated, church leaders decided to create a winter holiday that would draw on popular customs of various solstice celebrations. Historians believe the drunken revelry was actually similar to the Mardi Gras of today. Then in the 17th century, Puritan orthodoxy had no tolerance for this type of behavior, and Christmas was even outlawed for two decades in Boston.

It wasn’t until the mid 1800s when Christmas was recreated as a family-centered holiday of warmth and peace, a facelift credited in part to the works of two writers, Washington Irving and Charles Dickens. Although the “reason for the season” (as the catchy saying goes) has not changed, the celebration itself is completely unrecognizable from its origin.

This stark contrast is by no means unusual to holidays or even to us as individuals. Even as human beings, we go through changes during our lives that can leave us unrecognizable to those who may have known us long ago. We change in physical appearance and also in our behavior and temperament.

This week we read parshat Vayechi, the final Torah portion in the book of Genesis.  The text begins with Jacob’s request that he not be buried in Egypt, and continues with Jacob blessing each of his sons in his final hours.  This text ends with Joseph making a similar request that he be buried back in Israel when they finally leave Egypt.  What is notable about this culmination of several narratives is how Jacob and Joseph have changed over time and how they have remained the same.  Chapter 48, verse 8 finds us with Jacob giving a final blessing to Joseph’s sons.  He asks the same question his father asked of him when he came for a blessing: “Who are these?”

In this déjà vu moment of uncertainty, Ephraim and Menashe are unrecognizable to their grandfather. Perhaps this is because Jacob’s vision, like Isaac’s, had begun to fail, and he didn’t want to make the same mistake his father made. Or perhaps he failed to recognize Ephraim and Menashe because they had been born and raised in Egypt and thus had become indistinguishable from Egyptian youth. In either case, the boys appeared to have changed, and this was unnerving to their grandfather.  

The boys respond with the Shema, “Hear, oh Israel,” which of course has a double meaning since they are speaking to Jacob, Israel. This is their own way of saying that even though they may look like Egyptians, they affirm the same God as their father and grandfather.  What was inside them remained the same even if they looked physically different.

Some life changes leave us looking different, but staying ourselves on the inside. Other changes rock us so hard that we are never the same. In the case of Christmas, it might be a little of both. The celebration might be vastly different from its beginnings, but like we hear from Ephraim and Menashe, it’s up to those who celebrate to call out and remind those whose vision isn’t what it used to be that there’s a purpose bigger than any of us. It’s just not always easy to recognize.

Hard to Believe – Parshat Vayigash 5776

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hard-to-believe

Growing up watching the Tanner family on TV’s Full House, can you understand why I have mixed feelings about Netflix’s upcoming reboot of the series? Fuller House, which debuts February 26, follows the same format as the original, but with the kids now in the grown-up roles raising the next generation. The idea is tantalizingly nostalgic, but the secret recipe of the late 80s/early 90s series simply can’t be replicated. Sitcoms of that era had a cozy, comforting cheesiness that current television has evolved away from. I’m not sure that today’s audiences appreciate the signature catchphrases or the easily solved storyline problems as much as we used to. What made the show magical twenty years ago was that it was all just too happy to believe.

Life rarely feels like a sitcom. While we all experience moments that feel too good to be true, most days are mixes of highs and lows. Some things work out in our favor, some things don’t. However, there are moments of ultimate joy – the ones when we have to pinch ourselves to make sure they’re real. One of these for me was shortly after finding out I was expecting our daughter. The confirmation in the doctor’s office and seeing and hearing Shiri’s heart beat for the first time felt surreal. She’s already two years old, and I still have a hard time wrapping my head around the power of that moment.  

Parshat Vayigash, which we read this week, is about such a “believe it to see it” type of moment.  In fact, Joseph and his brothers have many moments of heartfelt joy.  Joseph’s brother Yehudah tries to redeem himself by asking to be imprisoned instead of Benjamin, and Joseph reveals himself to his brothers and heroically invites the whole family to Egypt to save them from the starvation facing Israel.  In addition, Joseph and his father Jacob are reunited, and Joseph is able to finally reveal his newfound position of power.  Joseph is given high praise in this parshah as a leader in Egypt, the saving grace to the people of Egypt and Israel, a loving brother, and a forgiver of past indiscretions.  

But when this news is first revealed to Jacob, it’s too much for him to believe. In chapter 45, verse 26, the brothers return from Egypt with the exciting news that their brother Joseph, whom they had presumed dead, is not only alive, but is the pharaoh’s right-hand man.  The brothers try to explain this to their father, and the text describes his reaction, saying: “His heart went numb, for he did not believe them.”  And why should he believe their fantastical story? After all, Jacob had been deceived before (and even did some deceiving himself).  Rather than take their word for it, Jacob demands to see with his own eyes if there is truth to their claims.  

Even though the miraculous events in the Torah aren’t regular occurrences in our modern lives, the emotional highs and lows we experience every day are not unlike those in our biblical narrative. That’s not exactly the case in the sitcoms of my childhood. The Tanners provided an entertaining escape because all conflict was neatly resolved in half-hour intervals. For us, the unbelievable high points we do have are made that much sweeter because they are part of a complicated, intricate tapestry of experiences.

Brother Against Brother – Parshat Miketz 5776

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brother-against-brother

This week we commemorated the Japanese military strike on Pearl Harbor, which led to the United States’ entry into World War II. Among the many tragic events following that attack was the internment of people of Japanese ancestry living in the United States, the majority of whom were American citizens. Sadder still is that fact that it wasn’t until 1992, more than 50 years after Pearl Harbor, that the Civil Liberties Act Amendments finally ensured all remaining internees received redress payments, a process that was put into motion in 1988.

Asking for and granting forgiveness can be a long, difficult road, especially in the extreme instance of nations at war. But that certainly doesn’t explain away this type of treatment of fellow citizens who are our brothers and sisters. This week’s Torah portion, parshat Miketz, speaks to the idea of familial forgiveness in a more literal sense. It’s a lesson in perseverance and understanding between brothers.  

We pick up in part two of the life and trying times of Joseph. Our hero has had a few setbacks, among them being sold into slavery by his brothers and thrown into jail. However, Joseph gets his big break when Pharaoh has a startling occurrence of dreams. When none of Pharaoh’s resident magicians are able to interpret his visions, Pharaoh calls on Joseph, and with God’s help, Joseph translates the dreams as a sign of an approaching period of fertility followed by a period of famine. Joseph presents Pharaoh with a game plan and becomes Pharaoh’s right-hand man in preparation for these times that will certainly be difficult not only for Egypt, but also neighboring lands.

With a little project management, Joseph stores the extra food during the fertile years and saves Egypt from starvation during the seven years of famine. Joseph’s brothers are sent by Jacob to Egypt to buy food for the family, and the stage is set for a surprise confrontation between the brothers and Joseph, who has become one of the most powerful men in all of Egypt.

Joseph has a choice to make. He can seek vengeance and throw his brothers into jail (or a dark pit) to rot, or he can forgive and accept them back with open arms. Though we know he chooses the path of forgiveness, he does so in a way that tests their feelings towards their father and their youngest brother Benjamin in order to see if they’ve repented yet for selling him into slavery.

The reunion has a happy ending, but not just because of forgiveness. The greater lesson here is one of perseverance.  Joseph could have easily given up hope when his brothers left him to die or while he was in jail when others were set free. Instead, he pressed on and let the fire burning inside him carry him from the darkness rather than consume him.  

Crimes committed out of fear against our brothers and sisters, whether in an immediate family or in the more global sense, are a byproduct of ignorance of the worst kind. It was this type of crippling ignorance that forced over 100,000 people into internment camps in the early 1940s. Now imagine if we saw our brothers the way Joseph saw his. Even for Joseph, free and full forgiveness was difficult to achieve, but it came as a result of understanding and ending the ignorance that existed between them. May we learn from Joseph that acceptance is possible, and may we have the perseverance to get there.