Author: Eve Posen

Hold Me Back – Parshat Korach 5783

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I can sympathize with Korach. That’s not to say that what he and his followers did was right, but I know what it’s like to be consumed by strong emotion. If you know me, you know I’m passionate when it comes to certain subjects. One of the hardest things for me to do is stop myself from going all in and throwing everything I have behind a cause when I’m sure that I’m right. On the one hand, I think it’s important to have opinions and make them known. On the other hand, speaking your mind can sometimes rub people the wrong way.

The good news is I’ve learned many tricks over the years to manage this passion. I might ask a friend or colleague who’s with me to give me a sign that I’m in that “zone.” Or if there’s time, I might discuss the situation in advance to get feedback on my emotional level first. I’ve also learned the valuable lesson of being able to excuse myself to catch my breath before doing or saying something I’ll regret. I’m a natural redhead; fury is my language, and occasionally it can be put to good use.

Of course, the electrical charge of acting on emotion can come with consequences, which is clear in our Torah portion this week. This week we read Parshat Korach, the narrative detailing the revolt of Korach, who breaks apart the priesthood and prepares a revolt, while Datan and Aviram, two other troublemakers, begin a revolt of their own. Chaos breaks out in the camp, and those who don’t see a purpose to the fight pull away, which turns out to be solid decision-making, as the earth opens up and swallows Korach and his followers.

As we know from Parshat Noach, God promised never to destroy the entire world again. Clearly, that doesn’t stop God from momentarily becoming outraged and destroying groups of humanity because the rage is too great. That happens this week when Korach and his followers cannot restrain their dissent, and take physical actions to make their story known. Unfortunately, they go well beyond respectful dialogue and dissent.

Regarding this moment, the Talmud in tractate Hullin shares: “The world exists on account of people who are able to restrain themselves during a quarrel.” Rabbi Simcha Bunim, a key figure in Hasidic Judaism in 18th-century Poland, further explains that because Korach and his followers were not able to do that, the earth gave way and swallowed them. It’s a fairly apt metaphor; this is truly what happens when we’re not able to take a pause and gain control. It’s easy to be “swallowed up” in our emotions and personal feelings. It’s easy to temporarily let go of rational thought, despite the consequences. Parshat Korach reminds us that we can disagree without getting swallowed up in the silos of our own thinking.

Taking a New Path – Parshat Shlach Lecha 5783

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About a year and a half ago, the whole world was obsessed with Wordle, the online word-guessing game. Plenty of people still play (including me), and even continue to share their scores on social media. Scrolling through Facebook, you’ll find different responses. In fact, living on the West Coast, I actually had to stop myself from checking Facebook before I completed that day’s puzzle because other people’s reactions would actually make me nervous about my own skills. Sometimes the word is easy, sometimes it’s more obscure. Some players are proud, some are frustrated. It’s fascinating for everyone everywhere to be working on finding the same answer, working toward the same goal, and yet, true to human nature, have widely varying reactions to the challenge. Perhaps there’s something at the root of this notion, which is exactly why I love this week’s Torah portion. 

This week we read Parshat Shlach Lecha and the story of the spies. The parshah begins with Moshe sending 12 spies, one from each tribe, into the land of Cana’an to bring back an accounting of the land. The spies return with their report, and it’s pretty discouraging. Two spies report back with a positive message, but the negativity of the other ten reports instills so much fear into the nation that they decide they do not want to make the journey into the promised land after all. This infuriates God, who then decrees that anyone who went out from Egypt at age 20 or older will not be allowed to enter the land of Cana’an. This generation will purposefully die out so that a new generation, unfettered by the destructive mindset of their predecessors, can start anew.

The spies – it’s a classic story of groupthink, influence, and peer pressure. They all go into the same land to explore, and yet somehow two of the spies have a different take. There is much commentary on why, how, and what exactly made them stand out. However, the text itself gives us a big clue, if you’re into grammar. In chapter 13, when they go into Israel, there is a change in verb form. “They went up (plural) and came (singular).” In other words, they all started together, but arrived at different places, perhaps both mentally and physically. 

The Talmud suggests that this change in verb conjugation is about intention. While most of the “spies” went into the land and were gathering economic and military data, Caleb went to go visit the tomb of the patriarchs in Hebron. He went up in a group, but arrived at his conclusions about the land through his own exploration. Perhaps at the initial encounter he did see the land like the other scouts, but he pushed on using his own thinking to find a place that had meaning for him. 

Caleb and Joshua pave their own path in this week’s Torah portion. They’re able to escape the influence of the collective voice to show the power of the individual and some positive thinking. That’s not to say that the individual is always right or that going against the majority is always the preferred method. But perhaps the Torah portion this week is a lesson that sometimes the only way to get the full picture is to consider both sides, and then to draw your own conclusions.

Welcome to the Positivity – Parshat Beha’alotcha 5783

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There are certain moments of childhood that I will never forget. Many of them are positive, built on love and joyful celebration. Of course there are a few (and thankfully only a few) that I will never forget because of the yucky, negative feeling I had in that moment. I distinctly remember a moment when my piano teacher pulled my ponytail to make me sit up straighter, which is probably the reason I stopped learning piano. I remember the first time I got a bad burn from having my fingers too close to a fire. I’m sure you have your list as well. While the negative memories are filled with interactions that felt bad or shameful, the positive memories from throughout my life left me with amazing sensory moments. The smells, the feelings, they all bring back a sense of love and connection, especially when it comes to distinctly Jewish memories. Those Jewish memories are why I became a rabbi, because being in shul and “doing Jewish” offered a sense of peace, beauty, and wholeness.

As I walk into my tenth High Holidays this fall at Neveh Shalom, you probably know by now that one of my main goals in my rabbinate is instilling a love of Judaism built on everyone feeling safe, joyful, and welcomed in our community, and that starts with our youngest congregants, because that’s when those positive (or negative) memories are made. If you’ve seen the carts of fidget toys or noticed a child playing with Wikki Stix, stickers, or puzzles, it’s with this purpose in mind. There are more ways to keep children engaged in services than just scolding them for being noisy. They’re the future leaders of our Jewish community, and they should remember the positive feelings they had being part of it. And this doesn’t stop at children; it’s equally important to make adults feel loved and welcomed, whether that means changing the wording and pacing of prayers and announcements, or creating new programs or connective opportunities so that no one feels left out. But why is this so critical? One answer is in this week’s Torah portion.

Our parshah this week, Beha’alotcha, lands us with Aaron and Moses as they get into their daily requirements of their jobs. This section of text begins with instructions for the purification of the Levites in their holy work in the Tabernacle. We read about the first Passover sacrifice in the wilderness and how to celebrate Passover if we miss it the first time around. Then the text turns toward the Tabernacle itself, the Mishkan, and teaches us that God’s presence hovers over it in a cloud. Finally, Moses’s family – his father-in-law, wife, and children – return to join him and the rest of the Israelite nation on their journey through the wilderness.

In chapter 8, verse 19 we’re in the midst of the work Aaron and his sons should do for the priesthood and the Israelites. God instructs Aaron to perform the service for the Israelites at the Tent of Meeting, among the people, so that the Israelites, who are not usually permitted to be in the holy space, can feel connection without facing a plague for violating the rules. One medieval commentator suggests that this verse offers the message: “May all their visits to the sanctuary be for reasons of joy and not calamity. May all their memories of these visits be pleasant ones.”

Amen! Our work here is to support a positive, welcoming, loving environment where all who enter feel they belong. My fellow clergy and I may sound like broken records on this subject, but it’s some of the most important work we do. It’s how we make those positive memories happen and pave the way for an active, engaged, dedicated new generation.

Where You Fit – Parshat Naso 5783

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I have a deep desire, like so many human beings, to belong, both in a communal sense and a personal relationship sense. If I feel a shift in a relationship that I wasn’t expecting or can’t explain, I start to panic a little bit. Last winter, a dear friend and I experienced such a shift, when texts went from multiple times a day, to once a day, to maybe once a week. As much as I know that relationships change, I struggled with a silence that was painful to my heart. In these moments of uncertainty in relationships, how do we find our footing and step forward, not knowing where we actually stand?

Knowing where you fit in, whether person-to-person or in society at large, is so human an experience that the Torah itself deals with that feeling in this week’s Torah portion. As we read Parshat Naso this week, we read about the Israelite society trying to move forward after leaving Egypt and about the establishment of a successful community. The narrative picks up with a second counting of the people; laws about how we are to treat one another and the property that we own; the blessing of the priests to the people; and the laws of the Nazir, detailing how we might dedicate ourselves directly to God. 

Naso has the distinction of being the longest Torah portion in the entire Torah. It doesn’t include the most number of commandments, but it goes into quite some detail with the ways in which community should be built. The first half of the portion deals with circumstances when one’s place in the community is in question because of their own behavior, and the second half deals with the offerings brought by each tribe as holy space is dedicated. 

Why do these things go together? Why does it take so many words to explain these concepts? Perhaps it’s because establishing protocols, and specifically establishing how to build holy relationships, is very detailed work. There are so many complexities when it comes to community and the individual’s place within it, especially today when we’ve got technology that makes it both easier to connect, and at the same time more difficult to really understand one another. These nuances might come across more easily in face-to-face interactions, but it takes many more words to try to express this in writing.

Parshat Naso reminds us that establishing holy community requires that we examine our communication and that we see one another, not just through siloed words or deeds, but through interaction. That’s how we truly find each other. That’s how we lift one another up and create a fundamentally whole society.

Just Say Yes – Parshat Bamidbar 5783

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Why is it that so many of our asks as parents are met with arguments from our children? Sometimes it feels as if there’s nothing I could say that would be accepted at face value without some sort of pushback. It’s not like the daily expectations have changed that much. For years we’ve been asking them every morning to get dressed, come downstairs, eat breakfast, and get in the car, only to be met with variations on “I can’t because . . .” Why are we still arguing about hard and fast rules that we’ve had for what feels like an eternity?

It is true, however, that every once in a while we start the day with no arguments, and Duncan and I find ourselves marveling at a morning without whining. Perhaps this is a little bit like what God must be feeling in our Torah portion this week. This week we begin the fourth book of the Torah, Sefer Bamidbar. The Israelites are now in the desert, and the groundwork for the structure of their future has been laid. Army leaders are appointed to lead alongside Moses and Aaron, a census is taken of the people, and we learn that the camps are situated in a specific order, each with a flag in the center that tells us which tribe is there. The time spent in Egypt is a distant memory at this point.

In chapter two, God asks the people to line up in order, according to their households and their ancestral inheritance. If you’ve been following along week to week, you know that anytime the Israelites feel uncomfortable or anytime they receive direction from Moses, they complain mightily about the task. Whether the complaint is about the taste of the water or the amount of food, their ability to complain, much like children, seems boundless. Yet, this week, the entire Israelite nation does what God asks without questioning, without asserting dominance or status.

Why this sudden change in response? The text is unclear. No real reason is given, except that chapter three of Bamidbar begins by recounting that Aaron’s sons died because they did not follow God’s procedures. Perhaps the Torah calls this out knowing that the Israelites have short-term memory issues, not unlike a toddler. On the other hand, it also stands to reason that the Israelites are doing their very best to follow those rules and show that they are committed to the future.

This is still a toddler nation we’re talking about, new to freedom and purpose. There are magical moments, but they’re also testing limits. This week’s parshah may serve as a helpful reminder to parents that eventually children will recognize the limits and expectations we set for them and understand that the decisions we make are out of love.