It is now 2:30am, my sister and tanta just pulled away in their nesher to the airport, and I am overcome with sadness and tears for many reasons I think. First, I am sad to see them go. Their trip here for the last 18 days was a whirlwind of services, holiday, travel, exploration, love and support. We bonded, my sister and I have grown together, today I experienced my first day without her by my side in the last 2 weeks and I missed her so much and couldn’t wait to get home to see her again. We did homework together, me helping her, her helping me. We shared stories of the past 7 months, hugged, fought a little, laughed and mostly just enjoyed being together for the first time in a long time! I love my sister, I am so happy to have shared this time with her, She is amazing!
It was good to see tanta, she helped me to make pesach the way I wanted to, the way my mom has made it all my life. She pushed me to travel, see the country, enjoy my time here. We walked, talked, shopped, ate and enjoyed being together! I love my family!
And now, after what seemed at times like an eternity crammed into my small apartment, they are gone and I am alone. I know I will be home in just 2 short months, welcomed back into the loving embrace of my family, and I know how sweet it will be to see my mom, dad, papa, dog, aunts, cousins, uncles and sister. And I will cry tears of joy to be with them again, to be supported and loved in a way only my family can provide for me, I am anxious and excited to get there!
And now, I cry tears of sadness that I am here alone again, but tears of sadness also because I realize my experience here is quickly coming to an end. So much more I want to do and see before I leave, and so much I’ve already done. Israel feels like home. I felt such pride in being able to guide my family through Jerusalem, show them interesting places, lead them through the maze of streets. I have made a home here, made a family here, and it feels right.
This year hasn’t been easy for me, between my new found finicky tummy, and other issues, the challenges of language and school, I have had a rough year. But, despite it all, I love this place, I love the home I have made, and I will be sad to leave this place that feels like home…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s